Movin' On Up

AJ recently graduated to the land of high chairs. Joe and I love this development, because it means that we are able to enjoy restaurants more than when we were passing him back and forth on laps. Being a little bit of a germophobe, using public high chairs that are crusted over with months worth of goo and ooze forces me to take a deep breath and remind myself that he will soon be crawling all over the germ-infested floor anyway. I don't want to misrepresent my level of cleanliness--I am not a clean freak who disinfects my kitchen at home every night. I am more of the germophobe breed who can't stop thinking about how I walk through pigeon droppings on the creepy crawly Chicago sidewalks and then walk into my apartment wearing those same shoes. So for the restaurant high chairs, I bring my Floppy Seat cover that at least encases the goo and ooze and then also wipe down all surfaces within gumming range with a wet wipe. And then I order a glass of wine and tell myself those three magic words of parenting--let it go.

Trunk Show

AJ's grandma made him this adorable elephant costume for Halloween. Our party with our little Tummy Time buddies was canceled today due to a cold that is going around--bummer! So I am thinking of places where I can take him in his costume. Like the grocery store.

Soprano Suits

Yo! You think these guys are gonna take it easy? Fugeddaboutit. That guy in the bottom photo goes by the nickname Big Diaper. You got a problem with that?

The World's Greatest Invention

The person who invented the self-feeder for babies should get a prize of some sort. It is this ingenious little contraption that is a plastic handle attached to a small bag made out of the same material as mesh shorts. You can pop a piece of frozen banana in the bag, close the handle and presto--the kid is instantly fascinated and satisfied with sucking on the frozen banana for at least 20 minutes until it becomes mushy enough that he can suck it out through the holes. I am already planning what to do with my extra 20 minutes every day--a long shower, reading an entire chapter in a book, maybe even cooking something other than frozen pizza for the adults in the house to eat.

Bear Down

AJ has been spoiled rotten by his uncles and godmother with cool pro sports team gear that would make grown men drool. In baseball season, he had his choice of home or away White Sox onesies with matching team logo socks for game day. When the Cubs played, he had his own personalized jersey to wear while watching the game on t.v. Now that football season has rolled around, he sports a stylish set of blue and orange Bears coveralls with matching hat on football Sundays. I am not that into watching sports on t.v., but I have to admit that I am into dressing AJ up in his appropriate uniform, at least for the first game or two of the season. My reward is that he usually spits up on whatever he is wearing by the third inning/10 minutes into the first half.

The picture is of AJ in his Bears coveralls and hat. Immediately after this picture was taken, AJ suffered a late hit from the arm of the chair he was sitting in when he toppled over onto it. Where is the regulation football helmet when you need it?

The Boob Tube

There is no way to sugarcoat this--AJ is a big fan of t.v. It all started when Joe would let AJ watch White Sox games with him this summer. I thought it was neat for Joe and AJ to have some father-son bonding time over the great American pastime of baseball. How much more wholesome does it get? How naive I was.

AJ was mesmerized from the get-go. Joe just got his dream t.v. a few months before the baby was born--a huge, flat screen monster that is three times the size of A.J--making Joe much more interested in t.v. than he used to be. Joe never buys anything for himself (even his t-shirts have holes), so I was initially supportive of the purchase as a well-deserved indulgence.

My sister is an early childhood education major who is currently living in Chile to teach at an international school. We were talking with her on the webcam one day after getting the t.v. when she spotted the elephant in the room in the back of the shot and tried to casually ask--um, is that a giant t.v. in your living room? She tries very hard to be nonjudgmental, but she and her husband don't even own a t.v., much less a 5 footer that looms over the living room to squash conversation as we all stare at it like zombies.

Then I read that the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no t.v. until age 2. And I read somewhere else that there is a theory about t.v. watching in young babies leading to attention deficit disorder. Yikes. So I freak out every time AJ is in the room when the t.v. is on, driving Joe insane. AJ doesn't help the matter by doing contortionist moves to crane his neck around to try to see the screen regardless of where you position him in the room. I even asked Joe to have AJ face the opposite direction from the t.v. screen in his bouncy seat, only to come back in the room to find AJ nearly doing a back bend in the bouncy seat to try to look at the t.v. screen. The straw that broke the camel's back was when I was giving AJ a bath in his portable tub on the kitchen counter (which has a direct sight line to the t.v.), and AJ was lounging in the tub watching t.v. like Arsenio Hall's character in Coming to America--see attached photos.

Just Another Tuesday

What started out as just another Tuesday turned into a big day for AJ--he rolled over to push up and grabbed his toes for the first time all in the same day. The little tween skateboarders in the park near our place would say AJ learned some mad new tricks yesterday. He had been getting interested in his toes for the last week or so, but would do the lazy man's inspection where he would pull on his pant legs to try to get his feet a little closer to his hands. I thought this might be a Leniton handicap, because we tend to have pretty tight hamstrings that made the sit-n-reach test in the presidential physical fitness challenge in gym class an embarrassment. But yesterday morning when his pants were off for a diaper change, he finally made the effort to heave his huge toes up there to his hands. He even obliged me with repeat performances of his new tricks for the camera. If you click on the second picture to enlarge it, you will see AJ's other recent trick--drooling all over everything in sight.

Uncle Andy

AJ spent some more time with his Uncle Andy during our visit to Iowa. Andy and all of Joe's brothers are already starting to prep AJ to become a basketball player so that he can someday show them up on the court. They assure me that if AJ can just learn the up-and-under move and grow to be 6'8" tall, he can qualify for a college scholarship. This is what I will tell AJ to get him to eat his spinach.

The Great Pumpkin Patch

Today AJ's Grammy Julie and I took him to a huge pumpkin patch to close out his week in Iowa. The pumpkin patch had the complete farm experience for those Iowa kids who live in the "big city"--a petting zoo, a tire swing, hayrack rides, a maize made out of hay bales, homemade ice cream, and the feature item--a huge, pick-your-own pumpkin patch. AJ was a little young to appreciate some of the more fun activities, but he liked watching the big kids running around everywhere. Next year he will be big enough to go for a wagon ride.

Your Grandmother Dresses You Funny

Some things never change. My mom has a penchant for pulling little kids' pants up to their armpits. I don't know if this started because she bought our clothes all a size too big to allow for growth or what, but she claims that she does this because it makes her feel assured that "no air is getting in [between the pants and the shirt] so that the baby is nice and toasty." You can see how happy AJ is about this in the top photo. The bottom photo is of me, circa 1980, to prove that my mom has been doing this for three decades. I am smiling despite the huge fashion faux pas of armpit-high pink polyester pants, a sign that I had been desensitized by that point in my childhood to this embarrassment.

'Cado!

To the relief of the woman who has been the sole source of calories for a 20 pound, 4 month old baby, we recently started AJ on "solid" foods. We use the term solids loosely, because everything that he can eat of course has to be very smooth and/or runny at this stage in the game. We started with the traditional rice cereal, which was acceptable but boring to AJ. From there, we decided to get adventurous and try avocado. AJ took to the avocado with great gusto, as you can see from the pictures above. Next week we are moving on to bananas and sweet potatoes.

Baptism by Water (and Fire)

This weekend was Andrew's baptism into the Catholic Church, which was also his baptism by fire into the very secret clan of Men in My Husband's Family Who Have Worn a Dress. Andrew's attire for the ceremony was the beautiful baptismal gown that was handmade by Andrew's paternal great-grandmother. Joe and his brothers also each wore the gown, much to their dismay later in life. I thought Andrew would have to endure merciless teasing from his paternal uncles about wearing an article of clothing that is reserved on most occasions for girls in our culture, but their comments were more of the hang-in-there-I-survived-this-too variety. Before the ceremony started, Joe and his three brothers collectively nixed the bonnet with ribbons that Joe's mother crocheted by arguing that Andrew was already being subjected to enough humiliation for one outfit. He did, however, wear the beautiful matching sweater and booties that his Grandma had crocheted for him. See the photographic evidence provided above.

The baptismal ceremony itself was lovely. It was done by a young priest, who was extremely nice and seemed genuinely happy to be the one welcoming the newest members of the Christian community. He is also the only priest I have ever seen with a shaved head, which added a little zen to the experience. My mom came into town to celebrate, as well as my friend, Kim, who is Andrew's godmother, and our friend Pete, who is the godfather. Kim was quickly able to get Andrew to laugh on cue for all of the photos by doing an excellent imitation of Elmo's laugh.

C.I.O.

We finally got up the nerve to let AJ cry it out (CIO) at bedtime. I have to start with the disclaimer that before we had children, I thought I would never be cold enough to let my child cry himself/herself to sleep. Then I had a child who was a problem sleeper, and I realized that we had a responsibility to help him learn how to sleep for his own health, even if it was hard for me to do. This realization made me think of a line that I used to hear from my dad as a kid: "This is more painful for me than it is for you." As a kid, I thought that was a bunch of baloney. As a parent, I realize how true it is.

For weeks we had discussed the CIO option, with Joe being very pro-CIO and me being hesitantly interested in the alleged benefits without being ready to go through the actual cry it out part. In the back of my mind, I thought that we would discuss it with the pediatrician, buy what I considered essential supplies for the project (video nursery monitor to make sure AJ is not crying because he leg is stuck between the crib slats, giant foam finger to use to shake at Joe when crying it out didn't work, etc.), read a few more books on the subject and finally set a date on the calendar for the big night. Instead, it happened spontaneously one night when I was rocking AJ after trying to calm him for bed for two hours. As I tried to cuddle and soothe him, AJ pushed away from me with all his strength, and I realized that I was not helping him get to sleep. In fact, it seemed that whatever I was doing was intensely annoying him. So I put him in the crib, kissed him on the head, took a deep breath and took an hour-long shower to try to drown out his crying.

He cried for two hours that first night, which was actually less than I had steeled myself for. Don't get me wrong--it was still the hardest two hours of my life (even harder than childbirth), but I thought after AJ cried the entire way from Chicago to Des Moines, Iowa that crying it out would never get to the "out" part for us. The only thing that got me through it was when Joe told me to give AJ a chance to succeed on his own. It made me think that rushing in to comfort him would be a step down the slippery slope toward the mom who gets so upset when her child goes to kindergarten than she cries, making the kid upset as well instead of excited for the new experience.

The next night he cried for 45 minutes. On the third night, he went to bed without as much as a little peep. I was shocked. The third night success was especially appreciated by me, because Joe had an evening recruiting event for work that night, and I was not looking forward to enduring the crying on my own. On the fourth night, AJ was back to crying for 45 minutes. Tonight is the fifth night--we will see what it brings. I hope it is zzzs.

The pictures are of Andrew in his cute stripey hand-me-down PJs from his buddies S. and B.

Four Month Update

Our little guy hit the four month mark this week. At his pediatrician appointment today, his height was up to 28 inches, which puts him off the growth chart for his age. His weight was up to 19 lbs, 2 oz, hitting the 98th percentile there. It also confirmed our suspicion that at this age, you can actually watch the kid grow. Joe went away on a business trip last week, and he swore when he got back that AJ was noticeably larger. As the person who carries AJ around for most of the day, his height and weight numbers did not surprise me or my back. I am going to have to work on developing a good I-mean-business mom glare, though, because my sheer size advantage alone will not keep him in line for long. He will probably tower over me by the time he hits the fifth grade.

This last month was a big one for AJ. He has started honest-to-goodness laughing. I gave him credit for laughing earlier in his baby book, but only in the last few weeks has it been real little kid laughing. He loves having his tummy razzed and will giggle like a little boy when we do this. He also goes nuts when his daddy pretends to eat his toes and will give a good belly laugh for that. He isn't quite rolling over yet, but the doctor said this often comes later for heavy babies, because it takes more effort to heave that big belly over.

The pictures from top to bottom go from 4 months to 1 month. His arm is covering up the phone receiver (the object we are using for perspective) in the 4 month picture, but you can see how much higher his head is on the pillow behind him than it was last month.

Hat from Auntie Sarah

AJ's Auntie Sarah hand-knitted him this beautiful hat. We got loads of compliments on it the first time he wore it out for a stroller ride.

Cliches

I read a quote on parenthood the other day that I liked. Sharing it requires me admitting that I indulge in the guilty pleasure of reading People magazine online from time to time, which will disappoint my brother. He justifiably detests celebrity magazines as a waste of time.

The quote is from Jason Bateman about his daughter. "Just watching her become a kid, it's kind of cool. Simple things, all the cliché, annoying boring crap you've heard everybody say – it's pretty true."

The other day, AJ was napping on my chest with his little fingers wrapped around my arm and his head with the peach fuzz hair tucked under my chin, and I want to be able to remember that moment when I am 85.

Riding in Cars with (My) Boy

I am sure that I am not the first one to ever say this, but the person who said getting there is half the fun was definitely not traveling with a baby. I used to love driving because it was relaxing to turn on the radio and just cruise down the road. I grew up in a state with almost no public transportation, with the exception of school buses, so driving is in my blood.

However, since having a baby, driving is a craps shoot on whether the little guy will fall asleep or start howling. This takes much of the fun out of driving. In August, I was brave (or naive) enough to attempt to do the drive from Chicago to Des Moines with AJ by myself. The trip normally takes six hours and one stop. When AJ was crying before we ever hit the city limits, I thought about turning around and try again the next day. Twelve hours and seven stops later, I definitely wish I had. He would scream with such intensity that I thought he would vomit or burst an ear drum (his or mine), so I would stop to calm him down. As soon as I got him out of the car seat, he would smile and coo as if he was trying to charm me from putting him back in the seat. The instant I tried to buckle him back in, he would arch his back and start the screaming. I figured that he would eventually cry himself to sleep. After making five stops and only about 100 miles of progress, I realized that I could either move to Rock Falls, Illinois until AJ turned six and no longer needed a booster seat, or I could just suck it up and drive through the crying. He finally fell asleep eleven hours into the trip. He intensity and longevity in his crying in the car has led to my reluctance to try crying it out at night for his sleep problems.

Last week a friend from Iowa called to see if I wanted to meet her at the outlet mall on the outskirts of the Chicagoland area. After spending two hours stuck in traffic on the way home with the sun in AJ's eyes the entire time, major road construction and an accident, I tried to make myself feel better by thinking of how the situation could be worse. Like having twins in the car.

Septemberfest

Joe and I recently took AJ to Septemberfest at our church. AJ is going to be baptized in a few weeks, so Joe and I are trying to become more involved with the church community. We have decided to raise AJ in the Catholic church and to go to the same parish where Joe was baptized, went to elementary school and was confirmed.

This was the first event that we went to with just Joe, AJ and I without our extended family. It was a free-for-all on seating with tables set up for 8, so our little family of three needed to make friends to find a place to eat. It is fascinating to me how easy it is to strike up a conversation with other parents once you have kids. Being a parent is the key that gets you into the club of friendly random encounters around town. Suddenly I am finding myself trading stories with strangers about feeding times, diaper changes and when to introduce solids. Even Joe has been drawn into these conversations, and he is generally not chatty with strangers. It is interesting that the parents often don't ever exchange their own names, but you still know the name, age and potty habits of each other's children.

Young Frankenstein

I have unintentionally created a little sleep monster, although he is a very cute little monster. Back in August when I went to visit my family in Iowa, I let AJ sleep in my bed with me the first night that we got there because he screamed for the entire hellish ride from Chicago to Des Moines and I was too tired to set up his portable bed when we arrived. He slept so well that night (in retrospect, perhaps because he was exhausted from so much crying) that I continued to let him sleep in my bed the rest of the two weeks that we were there. I am sure that experienced parents can see where this is going. He loved sleeping in a warm, cozy bed with mom so much that he is very resistant to giving it up. So we are now trying to break him of this habit. One book suggested that I sleep with one of his crib sheets on my pillow in my bed for a week and then put that on his crib so that he has the familiar mom smell. Another suggestion was to warm the sheet in the dryer before putting him in the crib so that it is snuggly. So far, no dice. We are soliciting other suggestions...

The picture is of AJ wide awake on the sheet that I very carefully branded with my smell for a week.

Conquering the King of Prussia

This weekend AJ and I went to Philadelphia to visit my two good friends from law school, AJ's Auntie Nikki and Auntie Anna, as well as Anna's husband and two adorable boys. Anna was one of my first friends to have kids and has always been my role model as a mom.

Saturday was a girls' day out. AJ got to tag along with the ladies, and he helped us to conquer the famous King of Prussia mall that is located outside Philly. Before we left, Joe jokingly told AJ that he would give AJ $5 in his piggy bank if AJ would scream and cry whenever I got in line at the mall to checkout in order to prevent me from spending money. The girls and I retaliated by promising AJ $10 in his piggy bank if he would be a good shopper. Perhaps we should all just put $20 in AJ's piggy bank for his future therapy needs due to his neurotic parents.

The pictures from top to bottom are Anna's two adorable boys, AJ with his Auntie Nikki and AJ with his Auntie Anna.